Laeke Gebre asked:


Today’s parents feel pressured to use technology to begin their child’s education in utero. For example, the BabyPlus Prenatal Education System promises to “give your baby a headstart” by playing rhythmic patterns to help stimulate early learning. It is time, therefore, to step back and evaluate the true value of toys that incorporate technology to teach.

Toys that are formed from high-tech electronics embedded with semiconductor chips are generally known as edutainment toys. The quality and substance of their play may be limited by the number of buttons a child can push. Some promise to challenge a child by allowing him or her to interact with the educational content to learn it. For example, V.Smile offers a Baby Infant Development System aimed at introducing interactive learning to kids 9 months to 3 years. They can watch educational videos with this system or push buttons on a tray to influence what is happening on a television screen.

Some older toys are also adding electronic bells and whistles to appeal to the current technologically sophisticated generation of children. Dolls now interact with the Internet. Wooden Brio trains make electronic sounds and can be controlled by infrared remotes. The classic Fisher-Price Rock-A-Stack now also comes in a Dance Baby Dance version whose center rod lights up and plays songs when the rings are stacked on it.

Open vs. Closed-ended Toys

An open-ended toy encourages free play with an unlimited number of outcomes. For example, a building set can be used to construct a variety of different structures. A closed-ended toy, on the other hand, has a limited and often soon exhausted number of outcomes.

Not all closed-ended toys are bad. After all, a stacker is a classic closed-ended educational toy: it can only be put together correctly in one way. However, to solve a stacker, a child must develop and use logic and fine motor skills. The child benefits from the repetition of playing with the pieces of a stacker, manipulating them with his or her fingers over and over and thinking about how they fit together until the solution is mastered and then repeated for pleasure.

A closed-ended edutainment toy, on the other hand, may only require a child to press a few buttons. Eventually, it leads to a dead end and the child grows bored and tosses the toy aside. As Martha B. Bronson notes in The Right Stuff for Children Birth to Eight, although a child can have a rich play experience with any toy, basic, open-ended toys encourage this type of experience more than rigidly programmed toys with only one or two functions do. This sort of edutainment toy is not timeless. It is meant to be replaced sooner rather than later by the next big product in edutainment that uses the latest in technological innovations.

Often people assume that toys that use new technology are more innovative and educational than non-technological educational toys. In fact, childhood specialists such as Jane Roberts (president of Young Media Australia, a consumer advocacy group), question how educational and interactive high-tech edutainment toys really are, noting that “[p]ressing buttons and having items do things for you is fairly limiting in terms of how children learn.” Furthermore, many traditional toys are themselves becoming more innovative about stimulating a child’s imagination and creativity without having electronics in them. For example, the blocks in FoxMind’s Cliko game can be used for a variety of games that are challenging to children and adults alike.

Negative Impacts of Edutainment Toys

Overall, parents might not want to encourage children, especially younger ones, to use too often edutainment toys that involve televisions and computer screens. The authors of “Effects of Preschool Television Watching on First-Grade Children,” found that preschoolers who watched more television than their peers did worse in school and were not as well socialized when they entered first grade. Researchers Frederick Zimmerman and Dr. Dimitri Christakis found that babies watching Baby Einstein DVDs and videos scored lower on language skills than babies who had never watched them at all.

In addition, Allison Sloan notes in Shopper’s Guide to Healthier, Greener Toys that computers and television sets emit EMFs, “invisible forcefields whose possible health effects, from headaches to sleep disruption to cancer, are the subject of heated debate.” Children’s developing brains are in the greatest danger from such outside influences.

A final caution about edutainment toys is that they can foster in children an acceptance of a disposable consumer culture. A timeless toy such as a set of wooden unit blocks will hold up under heavy use for generations and can be played with at the same time by children (and adults!) of a variety of ages. Edutainment toys, on the other hand, are usually played with by only one child at a time, and they generally have a shorter playtime and life span. Children quickly master and get bored of them, or their high-tech components break, rendering the toy useless, and then they are discarded, releasing toxic chemicals and metals into the environment.

What Parents Can Do

As technology and the Internet permeate society and people’s lives more and more, it does make sense to introduce children to computers and other inventions that they will need to use as they grow older. A toy is not necessarily bad or useless because it incorporates technology. That said, smart parents should examine the stated purpose of an edutainment toy, evaluate how and what it teaches, and determine if their children could receive equal or greater value from a simpler, classic toy. Roberts warns against the dangers of a parent using high-tech toys as babysitters, substituting interaction with a machine such as a single-player computer game for what should be “the best learning for young children-real-life experience when they model, create, explore, and develop their own initiatives through play.”

Eva Fry asked:


Best Christmas Gift for Kids is Alcohol Free Parents

We look forward to the happiness Christmas brings, but not every home will be happy this year. This time of “good cheer” is often spoiled by a glass of “good cheer.” An alcoholic drink, consumed by a loved one, is often the reason for misery, not joy.

When I was a speaker for Mothers Against Drunk Driving, I spoke to an elementary class in Escondido California. After I spoke to the class, I received the following letter from a 9-year-old girl named Teresa Perez.

Dear Mrs. Fry

Thank you for volunteering to come to our class. You have really helped me understand that drinking is very bad and it makes you do really bad things and I would never like to die and leave my family. I really did like my dad, but one day my dad went to get a hair cut at my uncle’s house and he was walking back home because we were going to get ice cream and when he was coming back a drunk driver ran him over and he died and now I don’t have a dad and I really do miss him. I wish he did not die.

Your friend,

Teresa Perez

At the end of her letter she drew a picture of a car and a man lying on the ground.

The letter touched me deeply. I felt the hurt in this little girl’s life. I wondered how many more dear children, like Teresa, will lose a parent or loved one because someone decided to drink alcohol, and didn’t think of the consequences? How many more will have their lives shattered?

It is time we woke up to how our drinking habits affect others. If we’re not a part of the solution we are a part of the problem. Your social drink could be the reason your child becomes an alcoholic or a drunk driver. You could become the alcoholic or drunk driver! It’s not cool to drink alcohol!

Forty years ago smoking was considered cool, too. I remember watching James Dean with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, in the movie, Rebel Without a Cause. We teenagers thought smoking was cool and so most of us chose to smoke, just like many of our young people are doing today. What has been the result? Thousands lost their lives to the cool habit. Many more are still smoking with horrific lives, because of what tobacco has done to their bodies, and to their freedom

Cool? I don’t think so!

Are we going to let alcohol have the same disastrous affect on our young people that smoking cigarettes did to the young people of long ago?

It’s time we had a stop drinking campaign! Its time, we as adults took on the responsibility of being responsible and choose not to drink at all, for the sake of our children.

I especially appeal to you mothers. You have the most influence on you family.

This year lets give our kids a smart and wonderful Christmas gift, “the gift of alcohol-free parents!”

I don’t want any more letters from children like Teresa.

Chandrasekharan Praveen asked:


Regressive ELT… in God’s Own Country?

(An article originally submitted for publication in the daily newspaper, The New Indian Express, under the title The Affluent Apathy vis –a-vis The New English Curriculum : A Recipe for Disaster in God’s Own Country…? but was not published!

The following version save the first two paragraphs was submitted for publishing in the popular Indian weekly,

The Week … and again was not published .. Thanks to free online publishing this article will now see light!!!)

Abstract

The south India state of Kerala, popular to tourists as God’s Own Country has witnessed experiments in Education such as the District Primary Education Programme (DPEP). Then followed a revision of textbooks and these have gone a long way in overhauling the education system in the state.

The author, a former faculty of the Regional Institute of English South India, Bangalore, critically examines the introduction of the New English Curriculum with its excessive insistence on ‘discourse–based language teaching’. The author believes that an apathy of sorts has crept in some where and in the article attempts to give a clear perspective of the problems the ‘apathy’ is likely to create for the people of God’s Own Country.



Regressive ELT… in God’s Own Country?

Background history

1986 saw the revision of syllabus in English in the South Indian state of Kerala , which tourists extol as “God’s Own Country”. The texts basically reflected the Communication Approach, with an admixture of cognitive approaches. The controlled gradation of vocabulary and structures were dropped. DR. N. Vedamani Manuel, the former Dean and Professor of Education of the University of Kerala and a scholar extraordinaire, who has no axe to grind, commented on the introduction thus: “When introduced a vast majority of teachers did not have the competency to transact these materials. Perhaps 5 to 10% of pupils in the superior schools profited by these . The examination system was traditional as before. So in practice communication materials were converted to a set of question answers (aided by bazaar notes) to prepare for the external exam objectives. The real objectives of the scheme were bypassed.”

New Directions (or misdirection ?) in English Language teaching

Perhaps the most noticeable of all changes in the recently revised secondary curriculum in the state of Kerala, is the focus on communication, cognitive approaches, activity and child-centred approaches. This, no doubt is a welcome change and after all language is essentially meant for communication. But should the emphasis be on communication alone? What will come about if all activities are aimed at communication skills alone in the language classroom? These are questions that one cannot afford to ignore. But what exactly is now being transacted in the classroom ?. Let me once again quote Prof. Manuel who seriously studied the whole new ELT venture in Kerala: “The examination scheme has changed permitting more activity by the pupils. Under these conditions, the better pupils are likely to achieve far more than they did earlier. They are more free from the fetters of the teacher-controlled uniform rhythm, with a chance of achieving many of the expected objectives. But the ordinary and below average pupils pass through the motions of the activity without really realising the higher objectives. Since the evaluation procedures are liberalised, many of these glaring mistakes (and failure to really get a real control of English language even at SSLC level by most pupils) have not got focussed. The availability of bazaar notes written from the old perspectives, violating all the modern principles, and supplying material for satisfying the project assignments by copying from them has also been a factor in distorting the objectives. There is reason to believe that there are some high level resource persons behind the production of materials. But it would seem that the lower rungs of resource persons do not have these competencies and most teachers have not imbibed them. The new curriculum requires a high level of competency in English is several dimensions and in pedagogically transacting them in the spirit of the new scheme. It must be recorded that the highest level of pupils now really achieve English competencies – several times what they were attaining even five years ago – because of the higher visible targets and more freedom. But the ordinary and below average pupils have cumulative deficiencies in English competencies – which may be three to six years for most”.

Struggle for survival…?

It is interesting to note the kind of individuals who end up as the new generation English language teachers in God’s own country. Some have a bachelors degree in Functional or Communicative English . They are a breed of English teachers to whom the magnum opus of Joyce or Eliot are simply beyond their grasp and the intellectual masterpieces of FR Leavis or Walter Benjamin , shamefully unpalatable! After all, to pass the MA English correspondence course which over a dozen Universities in South India offers never requires a smattering of the literary sensibility of the stalwarts of English literature !…Baazar guides could always assure the acquiring of a PG degree in flying colours! Could this be the reason for advocating Communicative Language Teaching in the classroom?

New … but ill conceived

A few other time tested approaches to English Language Teaching (ELT) is also being ignored in the teaching of English in Kerala . These include the use of TV , Film and the New media for language teaching . But the hitch is that today, English Curriculum developers in Kerala dub all other forms of English language teaching as something worth ignoring. The result is that Communicative Language Teaching and discourse- based teaching and testing continues to receive a privileged status. Unfortunately enough the trend is not likely to halt because many Indian Universities are avidly planning the introduction of PG courses in Communicative English!

What ultimately?…Covert Strangulation?

Those new generation teachers who are engaged in applying the Philosophy of the New curriculum, in Kerala are more or less in an inebriated condition. The improvement in pass percentage in English in recent times in secondary schools have made them blind to the lowering of linguistic competence. Perhaps the best reference we have in literature to this is, ‘Newspeak’ of Nineteen Eighty Four by George Orwell. ‘Newspeak’ we know was designed to diminish the range of thoughts and this purpose is helped by reducing the choice of words to a minimum. ELT in Kerala too has pathetically reduced itself to the Newspeak-type language acquisition! The emphasis on Communicative Language Teaching, the decision to drop the direct teaching of grammar and the shunning of purely Literature – based textbooks in the Government schools where the common man sends his child and where the New Curriculum is vigorously introduced, results in the common man’s child developing a limited perspective of language! But language, we know is actually intended to serve as ones food for thought! Could this insistence on Communicative Language teaching be a covert attempt to paralyze the development of intellect of those attending Government schools ?

Lesson for ‘communikats’ from History

Its worth recalling how a wrong approach to grammar resulted in the emergence of ‘grammarian’ a term of reproach as Chambers Cyclopedia (1727-41,1779-86) puts it. The term meant ‘a person wholly inattentive to the minutiae of language, industriously employed about words and phrases; and incapable of perceiving the beauties, the delicacy, finesse, …etc of a sentiment’. Can we use the term ‘communikats’ to describe those insisting on communication as the only objective of ELT? A derogatory term of the kind is likely to be used sooner or later for the sheer fact that those new generation teachers are assiduously engaged in introducing a ‘diarrohea of discourses’ in the English language classroom as the one and only language learning activity and ignoring the teaching of literary texts that actually help in developing a fine literary sensibility.

Dogs tell tales too!!

It is common knowledge that one can often come across very intelligent and talented children even in families of the common man. Analogically speaking we can come across pet dogs, some with traits of pedigree breeds in families of ordinary folks. Such families may not have the financial resources to feed this pet dog, the kind of good quality meat and milk normally given to pedigree dogs like the Alsatian. So they serve it the leftovers of the family or perhaps rationed rice. This dog will not complain nor bite the hand that feeds it. It gobbles up whatever is given, to satisfy its hunger and has a famished existence. If this be so, imagine what happens to those intelligent and talented children who are given only a poor exposure to the English language ? Dogs grow and perish usually within the compound wall of the family…but not necessarily human beings. Its frightening to conjure up the kind of existence the child is likely to have once it enters the world of adults! Well, educationists have drawn several insights from the Pavlovian dog… and might go on to justify the kind of stuff being delivered today in the language classrooms. But dear reader , you and I know that the human mind never works like that of an animal. If you are sensible, and if rotten food is served, you will say ‘No’… You will shun the person who serves such food and turn to those that serve better quality food. The point I am trying to make is that one may know, that one has every right to get better quality education but one may fail to get it , if one has a slavish existence!

Are Malayalees really aiming to tick smart?

The greatest harm all this does to education is that Malayalees do not realize the kind of intellectually impoverished citizens for the global world which they will be nurturing in Government run schools where the new English Currriculum is diligently being implemented. Some of them are likely to lack a sense of grace in language use and are most likely to be thoroughly ignorant of literary classics. It is a flaw which would be apparently poignant when the learner of the present system attempts to communicate as a votary of the arteries that the Techno Park or the Smart city of the little state of Kerala. And who knows, these ‘lesser mortals’ may one day directly or indirectly serve all sections of our society!

What Malayalees need today is the concerted efforts of experienced educationists especially of the older generation, the civil servants, elected representatives, and of course the affluent class who can be willing sponsors to chalk out a meaningful programme for English language teaching in God’s Own Country . Failing to do so could result in Malayalees failing to effectively utilize the products of their ‘Smart City’ or Techno Park which is striving to make Malayalees the Children of a Greater God !

Conclusion

Experienced teachers of the older generation see the kind of English language teaching given in God’s Own Country a kind of trivialization of English language teaching (ELT). The over emphasis on teaching ‘language functions’ and ‘discourses’ as part of Communicative Language Teaching and the neglect of English literature, the older generation of teachers believe , impoverishes English language education and makes literary sense which gives grace to ones use of language, difficult to cultivate in learners.

If we don’t guide and help the common man who sends his child to a Government run school, to see the flaws in the kind of English language education their children receive, we will one day regret the kind of products this system is likely to generate .Much water would in the next few days flow under the magnificent Bharatha Puzha rail bridge and what will be will be for English Language Teaching in Kerala unless something concrete and constructive is done soon.

For more author details view: http://cpraveeneltconsultant.blogspot.com/

For other articles by the author view: http://cpraveenpublications.blogspot.com/

Rebecca Walker asked:


The development of your child is a complex and involved process, spanning a number of different physical and mental elements. Encouraging the mental development of your child, in terms of sociality, intellect and emotion is crucial in raising a well-rounded child to progress to adulthood, although it can often be quite difficult to think of creative and effective ways to stimulate this kind of development in your child. Given its importance, this kind of child development should be conducted both in and out of the classroom environment, to provide a consistent, efficient approach to growth and mental strength. In this article, we will look at some of the ways you as a parent can help stimulate your child’s development.

Stimulating child development is a crucial part of raising a child, and requires creativity as much as consideration and thought for the requirements of mature thought and intellect. As a parent, it can often be hard to understand how best to stimulate your child intellectually, and of course there are no rulebooks telling you how it must be done. A great deal of the process comes down to exercising common sense, and understanding the needs and requirements of your child. Through constant interaction with your child, you can help gain a better understanding of the emotional and physical needs which you should then cater to whilst pushing for intellectual development and challenge.

As a parent, you should actively look to immerse your child in reading and writing suitable for their stage of development, whilst also prompting basic numeracy and problem solving capabilities. This combined with the opportunity for creative expression should be a great way to encourage your child and build confidence, as well as creating and strengthening the social bond between parent and child. This kind of interaction and stimulation will ultimately improve your child’s social skills, and help emphasise the importance of emotional intelligence, as a supplement to social and academic intelligence.

By providing a range of activities for your child to accomplish, and providing praise and reward for successful completion, you can make learning and development fun for your child, and install a sense of passion as regards learning and self improvement. Through providing constant stimulation for your child, in balance with an emphasis on self dependence, you can create a suitable environment for personal and social development as your child ages and matures.

Child development is not set in stone, and it can be quite difficult to get it perfect every time. Similarly it takes a bit of getting to know your child and interaction on a parental basis, which again will differ from family to family. What is important, however, is that you present a consistent approach to parenting, providing the levels of intellectual and emotional stimulation required by your child at the various stages of development to raise your child to its full potential. By working in-sync with your local school and the educational development of your child, you can give him or her the best chance of success later down the line.

Wendy N. Lapidus-Saltz asked:


To many, creativity simply means being able to produce lots of ideas quickly, with the expectation that some will be useful. But to those who deeply desire to be thought of as “creative,” any creativity challenge is also seen as a chance to fail and be “uncreative.”

This can quickly produce a kind of stage fright. Stage fright involves fear, worry, often self-chastising, and can result in freezing up.

Naturally that inhibits the flow of ideas, producing more stage fright.

It’s a vicious cycle.

But it can be brought around to a calmer, more productive state where ideas come easily, and in a steady stream.

All you need to do then is record them as they come, take a breather, then later, choose among them, and elaborate on those select few.

But how do you get there?

Try these approaches:

1-Don’t Judge Creativity While Creating

Mental state rules. Your mental state, that is. If you feel creative, or even neutral, you’re in the right mind frame. The neutrality I’m talking about is a nonjudgmental state, where you’re not constantly asking yourself if you’re creative or uncreative.

Or whether an which ideas have merit.

In fact you’re not aware that you’re thinking at all.

Thinking about your thinking-which involves being judgmental-

stops the flow faster than anything else I know. Let your brainstorming be an unjudged flow. Leave the sorting for later.

If you judge now, you stop tapping into your right brain and move into your analytical left brain. Good for judging, editing, polishing. Not so great for producing a wide array of alternatives.

2-Remind yourself that you have already produced many ideas in your lifetime.

Count the times in a day that you come up with an idea. You’ll be surprised how many there are. Big ideas or small ideas? Smart or dumb ideas? Don’t categorize them that way. Or at all. Not yet.

Think that ideas are ideas. Their purpose is to create a flow of more.

Creativity is a habit, and producing a plethora of ideas gives you good odds of finding a great one in the bunch. The more you push yourself to churn them out in large numbers, the more your mind trains itself to think that way, and quickly!

There’s another reason why “the more, the merrier” is true in creative pursuits: even discarded ideas contain fragments of great thinking that you can use on the hand-picked winners.

Example: An ad agency team was searching for a surprising gift for a new client. They came up with delivering a do-it-yourself ice cream sundae setup to the client’s office for an afternoon of fun.

The delivery of an experiential event sounded good to the agency CEO, but because the client was in a sophisticated business, he replaced the sundae bar in favor of a caviar tasting. Shortly thereafter, the president of the client company awarded additional assignments to the agency.

He did it, he said, “Because you truly understand us.”

3-Make A Point Of Appreciating Creativity Wherever You Find It

Creativity is all around though not always beautiful, or cool, or in an art museum. Sometimes it’s the clever way something is displayed in a store. Or an apt phrase spoken by a colleague.

Instead of feeling disappointed that you didn’t think it up, embrace it. Imagine how the person may have come up with that thought. In fact, read books by creative types who discuss topics like “how I came up with that idea.”

You’ll learn tricks and techniques, and enter into the mindset of creativity.

Children can be our best teachers because their special perspective exhibits a rare view of the world. And they are unashamed-or unaware-of their uniqueness.

If your three-year-old saw a pregnant woman and whispered, “Mommy, that lady looks like she swallowed a beach ball!” would you feel proud or embarrassed?

It happened to my friend, and she applauded her son’s creative thought (and only later requested that he speak more quietly). Of course it helped that the expectant mom laughed till she cried.

4-Try Easy Creative Jumpstarts Beginning Today

Noticing and appreciating others’ creativity can inspire you and prime the pump.

Visit the art museum on free day. Since you paid nothing, it’s okay to go in for a half hour. Don’t expect to see much. Just take in what you can and let it feed your mind. You can return next week and see more if you like.

If you’re in a walking city, walk as much as you can, observe the people and the surroundings. Eavesdrop occasionally, and listen to the different words used to express thoughts and perspectives.

Which of your friends thinks very differently from you? Many of us choose friends who think like us. It’s comforting but not always mind-feeding.

Make an effort to get to know people unlike you. The stimulation, even when uncomfortable, allows you a peek outside your usual worldview; it broadens your scope and upgrades your thinking. (You get smarter!)

5-Watch TV Fewer Nights A Week

Choose shows that foster new thoughts, or show you the unexpected: situations, ideas, or people you rarely encounter. Also choose unique quality entertainment. Both of these are good food for your mind and a way to keep in touch with the best of the current media offerings.

You already know what junk food is, so you can easily determine what “junk thoughts” are. Indulge in them only rarely and mostly to know what the public is seeing.

6-Tap Into Trends To Boost Your Ideas

A direct approach to getting ideas would simply be to copy what exists: if everyone is buying small cars, you, too, buy a small car. If you’re in the car-design business, your company designs another small car.

“Trend-tapping” is an indirect approach. You can, for example, tap into the smaller-car phenomenon indirectly:

If you’re a luggage maker, you could design luggage that fits easily into smaller trunks.

If you’re a toy designer, you could produce games that kids can easily play in smaller cars. Maybe the game board is smaller and players don’t need to move around much to play.

If you design clothing accessories, you design a purse that is inspired by a hat you saw. Same for a media campaign, a new soup, a way to stimulate interest in a medical facility.

Whatever your occupation, you can use this approach.

You’re hitching a ride on the spirit or vibe of a product, company, or individual.

Ask yourself: what trend outside my field can I bring to my work?

If Mac created a car, what would it be like?

What if Porsche created a restaurant?

If Harvard designed a grade school curriculum, what would it be like?

If (a person currently in the media) were in charge of (whatever task you’re currently working on), how would s/he handle my new project?

7-Borrow Techniques From Improv Actors

Improvisational actors really know how to take an idea and run with it, quickly and

regularly. If you want to know how to produce lots of ideas fast, these are the people to model.

I discovered this when I was an creative director in advertising and I took many improv classes. Before long my group ran brainstorming sessions around that model.

Surprising? Not really.

“Improv”-ing (which, of course, comes from the word “improvising”) is a kind of brainstorming whereby one takes the info/situation given to her, and staying within that “world,” creates a scene.

Improv actors are instructed to never to negate an action or a line fed to them by another actor, but to move on with it.

If one actor says to another, “So what’s your husband up to?” the second actor would not say “But I’m single.” Instead she enters the reality that she has a husband.

Valid replies might be as varied as “He’s leaving me,” “He’s making pizza” or even “I just killed him” because they move the scene forward. This kind of answer is called “Yes and-”

Creativity demands a “Yes and-” answer, too, because it opens the door to more possibilities that build on each other and allow movement.

The opposite of “Yes and-” is “No but” and it brings the action to a dead halt.

If “how’s your husband?” gets the answer “I don’t have a husband,” there aren’t many places to go but to a scenario about amnesia (ho-hum). “Yes and-” generates hundreds of possibilities. I bet you could list twenty without even trying.

When you want to be creative, or to foster creativity in those around you, always reach for “Yes and-.” Discover how generative and life affirming that can be in all areas of your life.

-Final Thought

If you were to choose one technique you just learned to use on your current project, which technique would you use, and what new thought(s) might arise? ©2008 by Wendy Lapidus-Saltz. All rights reserved.

Raymond asked:


This article describes building self confidence in children. Children are very sensitive for encouragement and learning progress. They need the support from adults or guardians from their environment to grow up well balanced. Therefore, it is very important to know that the adults or parents play an important role for building self confidence in children.

Provide children self confidence. It is important that children developed a positive image of their own. A positive image means that they are self confident, that they know their own limits and trusts their own abilities. People who are having a positive image have more fun in life. They can handle themselves in tough situations. So, it is the same situation for children, in order to start building self confidence in children, adults and parents should bring out the confidence in their kids. This feeling is not congenital. It’s created by the environment of the kid. True verbal and not verbal messages are very important to give many kinds of great of signals to the child. He or she sets this in to feelings of being accepting new things and activities in their lives. These messages are some sorts of important and useful signal that been created and stored in the children subconscious mind.

Give the children the value that they deserved. The most important thing is that we accept them for the person that they are. Whatever the children done right, we shall provide them with great compliments and celebration as an encouragement to continue their successes. If the children done something that are not really appropriate, then we have to give them great advices with right manner without yelling at them. We have let them to know that they are in the progress of learning and every mistake that they made eventually created another value for them for leaning another new thing. This will help for building self confidence in children.

Let children to be independent. Even it takes longer or if they making a mess, kids actually learn a lot more by trying out for them self’s. Patience and confidence can do a lot. Give kids the time and space to tryout something new and learn from their mistakes. Provide them with helping and cares if they need it, and be proud if they achieved their goal. Our progress for building self confidence in children will be worthy if the kids get more learning possibilities. Kids learn this way to become more confident. Some example exercises that we can try are letting children to solve their puzzle games by themselves.

Always encourage kids to try out new things. By giving kids positive thoughts and advices they learn to improve their skills and behavior. They learn to expand beyond their limits higher that we cannot ever imagine. When the children facing failure and feeling down, please step by their sides, bring them up again to solve the problems that they are facing. Let them understand that they are actually on stepping stone to success and they are the one who have the wills and powers to overcome the problems. Playing strategy boards games and scrabbles will provide them the opportunity to try on their own abilities. Hence, building self confidence in children can be a fun and learning process.

Give them the perfect role model. Kids learn a lot from adults. The way we and other adults deal with them will influence them a lot. We have to act as a role model to give them the right example.

We can start building self confidence in children now to start building their path to success.

jen asked:


I have a friend that has a 10 year old and I let her bring him over all the time, I’m practically his godmother, etc. He has an ipod, a cell phone and a laptop, he’s a smart, self proficient good kid.
I was left home alone as early as 8, I did my homework, heated up food, watched tv and went to bed, no problem. Yet, my friend still has people watch her kid when she has to work. He constantly needs moms attention, it’s annoying. I think he’s old enough already to do his own thing, he can bathe himself, fix himself meals, he does his homework on his own, he’s FINE without some adult hovering.
What age is acceptable to leave your kid home alone and quit spoiling him and sheltering him so much?

Tony Mase asked:


(c) 2008 Tony Mase

As the father of an active ten-year-old, for one reason or another, I’m frequently in contact with other parents. During our “sideline” conversations, I’ll very often hear one of them say something to the effect of, “my kids just don’t listen to me”.

Though I usually do my absolute best to keep my big mouth shut whenever this subject comes up, I can’t help but think to myself…

Did you ever wonder *why* your kids don’t listen to you?

Here, in my humble opinion, culled from many years of observation and personal experience, are the three biggest reasons why they don’t:

Biggest Reason #1 - You don’t listen to them.

Call it whatever you like but, the bottom line is, whatever you put out into the Universe comes back to you. Therefore, conversely, what you don’t put out into the Universe doesn’t come back to you, does it?

Of course not.

And with this in mind, did you ever stop to think that maybe the single biggest reason your kids don’t listen to you is…

Surprise!…

Because you don’t listen to them?

Here’s the deal…

In my experience, I’ve found kids of all ages are a whole heck of a lot smarter than most folks give them credit for being and have some really neat “stuff” to say and share with you if you’d just take the time to listen to them.

And maybe…

Just maybe…

If you’d take the time to listen, *really* listen, to what your kids have to say to you and take a sincere, genuine interest in it, your kids would take the time to listen, *really* listen, to what you have to say to them and take a sincere, genuine interest in it.

Is it worth your time and effort to find out?

I certainly think it is.

Biggest Reason #2 - You don’t do what you say you’re going to do.

In other words…

To put it bluntly…

You lie to your kids!

I don’t know any better way to put it.

If I had a dollar for each and every time I’ve been in a toy store (and I’m in toy stores a lot, I might add :-)) and heard a parent say to their son or daughter, “no, you can’t get it today, we’ll come back tomorrow”, I’d be far richer than I already am.

Now…

Let’s be honest with one another here…

When you say to your kids something like (and this is just one example of hundreds I could use here), “we’ll come back tomorrow”, do you *really* intend on doing it?

Odds are, from what I’ve seen, you don’t.

Therefore…

It’s a lie…

Plain and simple!

And how long do you think it is before your kids figure this out?

Not long, I promise you.

Is it any wonder then you’re kids don’t listen to you?

I think not.

Speaking of and closely related to not doing what you say you’re going to do is…

Biggest Reason #3 - You don’t keep the commitments you make.

Let me let you in on a little “secret” here…

In a child’s mind, the word “maybe” has all the force of “we’re definitely going to do it”.

So…

When one of your kids tells you, for example, there’s a certain movie they’d like to see and they ask you if they can go see it, when you respond with something like “maybe we’ll go see it on Saturday”, guess what?

That’s right…

Knowingly or unknowingly…

You just told them you’re going to see it on Saturday.

And when Saturday finally rolls along and you don’t follow through on your commitment to them, guess what?

You got it…

You’ve just given them yet another justifiable reason not to listen to a word you say.

Now, all this being said, some degree of your kids not listening to you can be written off as “kids just being kids” or their “marching to the beat of a different drummer”, so to speak.

However, more often than not, to very loosely paraphrase our old friend William Shakespeare…

The fault, dear parent, is not in our kids, but in ourselves.

Well worth pondering.

As a matter of fact…

Even better…

Well worth doing something about!

Judy Hansen asked:


For children, play is naturally enjoyable. And since it is their active engagement in things that interest them, play should be child-led, or at least child-inspired, for it to remain relevant and meaningful to them. Children at play are happily lost in themselves; they are in their own realm of wonder, exploration, and adventure, pulling parents in at times with a frequent “Let’s play, mom!” as an open invitation into that world.

As early as infancy, children immerse themselves in play activities with the purpose of making sense of the world around them. Play gives children the opportunity to learn and experience things themselves, which is vital for their development. Although peek-a-boo games seem pointless to adults, tots are awed by the surprise that awaits them as they see the suddenly emerging faces of people they love.

(Stages of Play)

During toddlerhood, children experience a motor-growth spurt that equips them to solitarily fiddle with anything they can get their hands on – be it a construction toy or the box from where it came.

Toddlers also love breaking into song, wiggling and jiggling to tunes, and imitating finger plays they are commonly exposed to.

Preschoolers begin extending their play to involve others, whether they bring others in at any stage of their game or they plan their game and its players’ way ahead. Their physical and motor skills allow them to widen their lay arena, from dramatic play to table games to outdoor pursuits.

School-age children start appreciating organized play – such as innovated songs and rhymes, games with rules, relays and other physical activities, sports and projects that they can accomplish over a certain time frame.

Play Perks:

Why the big fuss about playing? Play benefits the child in ways that might be a tad difficult for adults to imagine.

1. Play brings pure and utter joy.

A toddler who jumps into an empty box and runs around the house ‘driving a car’ shows the sheer happiness that play brings him or her. When children are asked what they did in school and they answer ‘play,’ it is a clear sign that these kids remember a feeling of genuine joy that is captured in this four-letter word.

2. Play fosters socio-emotional learning.

What does a ten-month-old baby who shrieks at the sight of her stuffed toy have in common with a ten-year-old boy who plays basketball with his friends? They both deal with their confidence as they choose to embark on their play activities. At the same time, they are displaying their independence in the decisions that they make. These two children are also internalizing social rules in their respective play situations: the baby waits patiently for her stuffed toy to appear, while the school-age child has to contend with an impending loss in a ball game.

3. Play hones physical and motor development.

Play often involves the use of the senses, the body, and the extremities. When children play, they exercise their bodies for physical strength, fluidity of movement, balance and coordination.

Perceptual-motor ability, or the capacity to coordinate what you perceive with how you move, is an essential skill that preschoolers need to develop. A three-year-old who is engrossed in digging, scooping, and pouring sand into a container must match his or her perception of the space in front of him or her with actual hand movements, so that he or she can successfully fulfill the motor activity.

4. Play facilitates cognitive learning.

Play is vital to the intellectual development of a child. We live in a symbolic world in which people need to decode words, actions, and numbers.

For young children, symbols do not naturally mean anything because they are just arbitrary representations of actual objects. The role of play is for the child to understand better cognitive concepts in ways that are enjoyable, real, concrete, and meaningful to them. For instance, through play, a child is able to comprehend that the equation 3 + 2 = 5 means ‘putting together’ his toy cars by lining them up in his makeshift parking lot. When he combines 2 triangles to make a square during block play, or writes down his score is a bowling game, the child is displaying what he knows about shapes and numbers.

Through play, the child is constructing his or her worldview by constantly working and reworking his understanding of concepts.

5. Play enhances language development.

Toddlers who are still grappling with words need to be immersed in oral language so they can imitate what they hear. They benefit from songs and rhymes that provide the basis for understanding how language works.

When these tots are playing with toys, adults model to them how language is used to label objects or describe an event. At play, preschoolers use language to interact, communicate ideas, and likewise learn from dialogues with more mature members of society.

6. Play encourages creativity.

Barney the dinosaur was right about using imagination to make things happen. A lump of Play-Doh suddenly turns into spaghetti with meat sauce and cheese; a small towel transforms into a cape that completes a superhero’s wardrobe; and a tin can serves as a drum that accompanies an aspiring rock artist. Play opens an entire avenue for children to express themselves, show what they know and how they feel, and to create their own masterpieces.

7. Play provides bonding opportunities.

Play is an important factor in child development. It provides for interaction, experimentation, and moral development. Here are some ways by which parents can encourage and support their children’s playtime.

- Let your child be the player-leader. Let children initiate their activity, set their own theme, choose the parameters where the play will take place. Play becomes a venue for children to express their feelings and be in control.

- Help them help themselves. When your 5-year-old asks for help, say, figuring out how to piece a puzzle together, stop yourself from coming to her rescue and first ask your child questions that allow him or her to help himself or herself. Say, “Where do you think this piece should go?” Afterward, commend his or her success.

- Play attention. Once you make a commitment to play with your child, watch for the following signals: Does he or she want you to actively play a part in the activity? Does he or she need encouragement? Is he or she tired or hungry? Does he or she need to take a break?

- Have a play plan. If you seem to have little time for playing with your child, consider using self-care chores to have fun with him or her. Also, get support from other people in your household, like older siblings, household help, or the child’s grandparents, so that they understand why play is important and how they should continue to encourage it.

Learn more about your handling & developing children at:

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Etienne A. Gibbs, MSW asked:


Nowadays, staying safe online has become a never-ending battle – for children as well as adults. Because cybercriminals are becoming smarter and more sophisticated in their operations, they are real threats to your personal security and privacy. Your money, your computer, your family, and your business are all at risk.

However, with a little common sense and some knowledge about what to do and not do, one can surf the ‘net unscathed. Here is a great set of rules for kids while they are online. I found these rules at safekids.com. Parents, Employers, and Managers, you can take some notes from these rules, too:

1. I will not give out personal information such as my address, telephone number, parents’ work address/telephone number, or the name and location of my school without my parents’ permission.

2. I will tell my parents right away if I come across any information that makes me feel uncomfortable.

3. I will never agree to get together with someone I “meet” online without first checking with my parents. If my parents agree to the meeting, I will be sure that it is in a public place and bring my mother or father along.

4. I will never send a person my picture or anything else without first checking with my parents.

5. I will not respond to any messages that are mean or in any way make me feel uncomfortable. It is not my fault if I get a message like that. If I do I will tell my parents right away so that they can contact the service provider.

6. I will talk with my parents so that we can set up rules for going online. We will decide upon the time of day that I can be online, the length of time I can be online and appropriate areas for me to visit. I will not access other areas or break these rules without their permission.

7. I will not give out my Internet password to anyone (even my best friends) other than my parents.

8. I will check with my parents before downloading or installing software or doing anything that could possibly hurt our computer or jeopardize my family’s privacy

9. I will be a good online citizen and not do anything that hurts other people or is against the law.

10. I will help my parents understand how to have fun and learn things online and teach them things about the Internet, computers and other technology.

Although you may follow the rules religiously, you, your computer, and your family might still be at risk because cybercriminals leave you with three choices:

1. Do nothing and hope their attacks, risks, and threats don’t occur on your computer.

2. Do research and get training to protect yourself, your family, and your business.

3. Get professional help to lockdown your system from all their attacks, risks, and threats.

Remember: When you say “No!” to hackers and spyware, everyone wins! When you don’t, we all lose!